Tondar's Daily Rant

Prepare yourself for the writings of Tondar the Destroyer, Baron of Atlanta, Rightful Heir to the Throne of Spain, from whom all babies come. As his will be blogged, so let it be done.

Saturday, October 14, 2006


Everybody remembers my tales of the Fetus Palace. Probably the most asked question is how does one go about acquiring a collection like that. Can you buy it on EBay?

PORT HURON, Mich. - Officials are trying to track down the origins of a mummified human skeleton that a Michigan woman tried to sell on eBay.

The St. Clair County medical examiner's office confiscated the mummified remains Tuesday from the home of Lynn Sterling.

Sterling, 45, told police she got the remains from a friend who works in demolition and said he found them in a Detroit school he helped tear down nearly 30 years ago, police said. She said she had contacted an attorney before posting the remains for sale.

"It's an anatomical, medical-use skeleton," Sterling told The Times Herald of Port Huron. "I would never have put it on (eBay) if I thought it was anything other than an anatomical, medical thing."

Yeah, stupid squares always trying to interfere with commerce. They ought to be deported to the mental hospital.

Remember the House movies? Those were way better than the TV show. Posted by Picasa

From CNNSI...

"ANN ARBOR, Mich. (AP) -- A 23-year-old man charged with stalking and sending threatening e-mails to Michigan coach Lloyd Carr has been ordered to undergo a psychiatric evaluation.


Akinmusuru was arrested Tuesday, the day that Carr and other coaches received threatening, harassing and obscene e-mail messages, campus police said. Details of the messages weren't released."

I think the issue here is that he threatened Carr during a winning season. Now I have to admit I haven't been banging the sides of the "Fire Lloyd Carr" bandwagon as loud lately. His new assistants have really the team playing so well that they haven't been placed in a position for Carr's decision making to affect the outcome of the game.

As for Akinmusuru, I would like to see the content of these threatening e-mails to find out if this is somebody with an axe to grind against Michigan Football or just your typical crazy with a 'puter.

Friday, October 13, 2006


This one's a Frankie special. Sure it's something Dumbs would do, but that doesn't make it any less funny.

I can't believe I forgot to update the kids on what happened last Thursday. Taco Armageddon went down as planned and it was another epic battle. Pigpen jumped out to a lead cutting his mouth to shreds in the process. Going into the 4th Round Pigpen and Brado ordered 4 more. However, Tondar was starting to he only went with two. In the meantime, Brado stopped at 16. Thus going into round 5, the score was Pigpen: 16, Brado: 16, Tondar: 14. But here, the tide changed with Pigpen going for 2, and Tondar finding a second wind with 3. Thus facing round 6 alone, Tondar could go for two and the win, or squeeze down one more for the tie. In the end, he opted for the tie and did not throw-up. Thus the final taco count looked like this...

Pigpen - 18
Tondar - 18
Brado - 16

In the end, we still ended up wandering into the park. Nobody puked and we weren't even that miserable. Looks like the forecast of mutually assured destruction was a bit premature.

I guess rock bottom wasn't as close as first anticipated. I could be living here! Posted by Picasa

Thursday, October 12, 2006


"I'm pregnant. I gonna drink. It milk for the baby."

"Your bra doesn't match anything you have on. But it does match your fat ho daughter."

Wednesday, October 11, 2006


Everybody's happy to see the Detroit Tigers up 2-0 on the Oakland A's after tonight's 8-5 win. With the next 3 games in Detroit, it should be easy for them to take care of their business, right?

Well, in theory that is correct. However, if we look at 2 historical examples, we see that a 2-0 lead isn't that great in a baseball series. For example, the 2004 NY Yankees went up 3-0 before David Ortiz homered in the 12th to keep the Boston Redsox alive. Boston went on to win the next 3 games and take the series 4-3.

Also don't forget the World Series that pissed me off the most and cemented my hatred of the NY Yankees. Back in 1996, John Smoltz and Greg Maddux had my Atlanta Braves up 2-0 with the 3 next games in Atlanta. Plus with Tom Glavine, Steve Avery, and John Smoltz set to pitch during that stretch, we should have seen a back to back Braves championship. Instead, the Braves crapped the bed and lost the next 4 games.

Now, I'm not predicting doom and gloom for the Tigers. However, with a young team I also don't want to see them crap the bed out of arrogance. But hopefully, with an old pro like manager Jim Leyland, they will be able to keep their cool and just keep on rolling through the playoffs.

I've Had Enough

You were under the impression
That when you were walking forward
You'd end up further onward
But things ain't quite that simple.

You got altered information
You were told to not take chances
You missed out on new dances
Now you're losing all your dimples.

My jacket's gonna be cut and slim and checked,
Maybe a touch of seersucker, with an open neck.
I ride a G S scooter with my hair cut neat,
Wear my wartime coat in the wind and sleet.

Love Reign O'er Me.
Love Reign O'er Me.

I've had enough of living
I've had enough of dying
I've had enough of smiling
I've had enough of crying

I've taken all the high roads
I've squandered and I've saved
I've had enough of childhood
I've had enough of graves...

Get a job and fight to keep it,
Strike out to reach a mountain.
Be so nice on the outside
But inside keep ambition

Don't cry because you hunt them
Hurt them first they'll love you
There's a millionaire above you
And you're under his suspicion.

I've had enough of dancehalls
I've had enough of pills
I've had enough of streetfights
I've seen my share of kills

I'm finished with the fashions
And acting like I'm tough
I'm bored with hate and passion
I've had enough of trying to love.

It appears that the political landscape of Europe is changing. Though most of the natives are maintaining their liberal tolerance for boobs, drugs, sex, and gays, they have grown less tolerant of Muslims. This is rather understandable since Muslims see liberal tolerance as a decadent weakness. Also if one considers the body count of jihadi "tolerance" (9/11, 3/11, 7/7), there is cause for concern.

It will be interesting to see if the deportation issue pushes itself further into European politics. On the one hand, this plays to the benefit of the hard right's traditional strengths on the continent. But more fundamentally, it squares the typical European value of tolerance off against itself. Europe is approaching a tipping point where tolerance for different lifestyles is running into Islam's intolerance towards their liberal hosts. With these views being mutually exclusive, it is unlikely that European society can maintain this dual approach to tolerance. Thus, either the Muslims will have to change and integrate, or will be forced out of Europe.

"He can't fulfill my shoes with a lime-green shirt on!"

"You robbed a garage? That is a great first date!"

I'm tired of beating for no good reason. Is that so hard to see? Posted by Picasa

Tuesday, October 10, 2006


Though it's not as bad as last year, it seems the Wolverines have had a few run-ins with the injury train this year. As the Detroit News reports...

ANN ARBOR -- Michigan's standout sophomore receiver Mario Manningham was expected to undergo arthroscopic surgery this morning to repair a partial torn meniscus and a possible partial tear of a medial collateral ligament in a knee, according to a source familiar with the situation.
He is expected to miss several weeks, beginning, obviously, with Saturday's prime-time game at Penn State.

This is a huge loss considering what a weapon he has been so far with his 9 touchdown catches. I'm not sure how long this injury takes to recover but hopefully Carl Tabb and Greg Mathews can step up to take his place. Plus, we should be getting TE Tyler Ecker back in time for the Penn State game.

As for Saturday's game against Michigan State, I was finally able to watch the tape yesterday morning. It wasn't so much how good UM looked, but how MSU imploded and gave the game away. To answer Heather's question, I watched that Adrian Arrington touchdown from the first quarter several times and he was in fact out of bounds. While the TV was busy talking about where his body landed, I thought he might have touched down with that one foot. Unfortunately, when you watch the replay from the endzone angle, you can see that there is clearly air under that foot at all times. Though like other games in the history of UM vs. MSU, this is not the first bad call. And it is certainly was not the most game turning bad call since MSU went on to implode and lose 31-13.

If you want to see a bad call changing the game, check out the infamous "They score, Tondar scores" game from 2001. Or their ankle grabbing containment of Heismond winner Desmond Howard in a 1990 28-27 loss (scene missing).

Monday, October 09, 2006


Tondarfest 2006 edition:

Considering all the fleshwounds, kraut-water, and hotdogs, Jason had a mild night compared to the rest of the kids. Posted by Picasa

Frank invades the living room of the Dark Lord Posted by Picasa

Downtown GR Posted by Picasa

The hair of my "girlfriend," Jennifer Posted by Picasa

-ndar, Heather & Jennifer Posted by Picasa

-ndar & heather Posted by Picasa