Tondar's Daily Rant

Prepare yourself for the writings of Tondar the Destroyer, Baron of Atlanta, Rightful Heir to the Throne of Spain, from whom all babies come. As his will be blogged, so let it be done.

Saturday, April 21, 2007


Rise up boys, here come the NBA Playoffs.

From Seth...

"What's the fucking point of having a hockey game -- making everyone go through the trouble -- if the game has been decided already?

I'm so close to boycotting the NHL next year for this. I've written to the NHLOA, letting them know there is a problem in games at the Saddledome, but each game is getting noticeably worse.

Even Babcock, who normally keeps his mouth shut about officials, responded during a period break that the only thing he thought his team really needed to do was do a better job getting on the refs. That was after two 5-on-3 situations (both leading to goals) by Calgary that never should have been even 5-on-4s. And the crap, the obvious, odious CRAP going on when the Flames were on defense -- holding every Wings player against the boards, cross-checking, tripping, holding the stick, and then totally grabbing on to Detroit's forwards every time the Calgary forwards started pushing the puck forwards.

I've watched other series, and they're the up-and-down hockey we were promised when the league said it would finally enforce its rules. And Games 1 and 2 in Detroit were like that. But soon as we landed in Calgary, suddenly hockey is a grabfest along the boards again? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE????????"

New Order - True Faith

I feel so extraordinary
Somethings got a hold on me
I get this feeling Im in motion
A sudden sense of liberty
I dont care cause Im not there
And I dont care if Im here tomorrow
Again and again Ive taken too much
Of the things that cost you too much

I used to think that the day would never come
I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun
My morning sun is the drug that brings me near
To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear
I used to think that the day would never come
That my life would depend on the morning sun...

When I was a very small boy,
Very small boys talked to me
Now that we've grown up together
They're afraid of what they see
Thats the price that we all pay
Our valued destiny comes to nothing
I cant tell you where we're going
I guess there was just no way of knowing

I used to think that the day would never come
I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun
My morning sun is the drug that brings me near
To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear
I used to think that the day would never come
That my life would depend on the morning sun...

I feel so extraordinary
Somethings got a hold on me
I get this feeling Im in motion
A sudden sense of liberty
The chances are we've gone too far
You took my time and you took my money
Now I fear you've left me standing
In a world that's so demanding

I used to think that the day would never come
I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun
My morning sun is the drug that brings me near
To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear
I used to think that the day would never come
That my life would depend on the morning sun...

Friday, April 20, 2007


What do you do when a big angry black man wants to pound on you? Special kudos to the Japanese camera work to reveal the "Holy Crap Face" of the pitcher.

Pull the Christopher Cross and Run Like The Wind

Just ask General Washington, NYC is great. But it doesn't mean you're not going to get run over by a delivery boy on a bike or have somebody spit in your mouth.

Thursday, April 19, 2007


The GA Renaissance Festival

Vegas (Caesar's, I think)

Something from Grand Rapids.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007


For Seth's sake we kept the training wheels on this weekend.

As a patron of the arts I commissioned a work to celebrate the 308 period.

And I can be your hero. I will catch you when you fall. My arms will reach out to in your time of need. I will give you my all.

Monday, April 16, 2007


So Tondar found Silent Bob in Manchester, TN.

Sure enough the dam produced an echo, but it was best heard when shouting, "Go Blue!"

I want this mask for Halloween.

Of course I'm Rock and Roll. Can't you see Tondar, the guitar, and the Nashville skyline? What else are we to infer?

Yeah, it was great to see Nate and Seth and of course everybody loves Miss Ashley Carol (yo).

From Seth...

"I thought the Red Wings were supposed to be grandpas by now. I mean, it's been five years since we were the oldest team in the league, winning the Stanley Cup with more guys over 35 than under 28.

Now, though, we have a LOT of youth, which says to me this could be a team able to compete -- provided key elements stay in place -- long into the next decade.

Regulars in their 20s: Zetterberg, Datsyuk, Lebda, Kronwall, Cleary, Filppula, Calder, Franzen, Hudler. Plus Fischer if he can come back and Kopeck, plus Joey MacDonald in goal.

That's half of your player roster, plus the goalie, pretty much available for the next decade. And it's not like the rest of the team is a bunch of fogies, either, with Samuelsson, Lilja, Holmstrom, Bertuzzi and Markov in their early '30s.

Five years from now, Schneider will be 43, Lidstrom and Lang will be 42, Draper 41, Maltby and Osgood 40. Only Hasek and Chelios will almost certainly be retired.

We've lost a few guys along the way in this decade of dominance. But we look pretty well set to make it last for another decade still!"

From Seth...

"So on the drive home from the airport this morning, the radio was talking about what was the shrewdest move made by Kenny Holland in building the Red Wings.

There's so many to choose from.

My pick: Acquiring Chris Chelios, just because I wanted to rub it in the eye of everyone who accused him of "mortgaging the future" when he made it.

The story goes, in 1998-99 the league was pretty much ready to hand the cup to either Ottawa (the beneficiary of a Penguins-like draft string that had won the President's Cup) or Colorado, who had just acquired Theo Fleury. Detroit was only a few games above .500 in an easy Central Division (Nashville was still brand new, St. Louis mediocre, Chicago stunk). They were defending cup champions, but lost a bunch of guys from that 97-98 team. Osgood had no solid backup. Uwe Krupp and Todd Gill were injured, meaning after Lidstrom and Murphy, our 3 and 4 defenders were Aaron Ward and Jamie Macoun.

Now, we'd been acquiring draft picks in trades over previous years, including those from trading Vernon. The prevailing thought was the Wings were now aging and would stockpile prospects to rebuild in a few years around Lidstrom and Kozlov, once Yzerman, Shanahan, Murphy and Larionov retired and Fedorov moved on. 1998-99 was going to be the last gasp of the old crowd.

Then, nearing the trade deadline, Holland instead went the other route. He got Ulf Samuelsson from the Rangers for a few '99 draft picks. He got Wendel Clark (Tampa's leading scorer and longtime Leafs captain) and Bill Ranford for goalie prospect Kevin Hodson and 1st and 3rd round picks. That might have been enough right there. But the same week, Chris Chelios asked the Blackhawks to extend his contract. Looking at his age, they refused, and Chelios, their biggest star for a decade, instead asked for a trade. The Red Wings jumped, with what seemed a steep price: NHL-ready defensive prospect Anders Eriksson, the last of their '99 stockpile (before the 4th round at least) and the 1st round pick in 2001. The Wings promptly offered him 2 more years on his contract.

It was the Chelios deal that got the most heat, even though Wendel Clark was closer to retirement and Ulf Samuellson had a broken toe that would keep him out to the playoffs. Chelios was considered washed up, and it looked like they were getting an overpriced 3rd or 4th defender who would be a financial drain the following season and then retire.

It made them instant contenders for the 1998-99 cup, but the real question was what if we didn't win it? To pundits, it looked like the Wings had set themselves up to hit the new millenium with a mass retirement and no draft picks on their way up.

The Wings finished hot, meaning those traded picks attached to the Wings' fortunes fell a good 10 spots in each round since the deadline. They didn't win the cup in '99, or in 2000. Samuelsson's injury made him ineffective with Detroit, and he didn't know the players he was playing with anyway. Clark looked closer to retirement than we'd realized, and as an offensive-minded left winger, didn't fit Scotty Bowman's left-wing lock system (where the left winger hung back with the defenders). Ranford actually proved more valuable, backstopping the Wings well when Osgood was sidelined during the end-of-the-season push.

But since 1998-99 -- that's EIGHT YEARS AGO -- Chris Chelios has proven himself a cornerstone 3rd defender, penalty killer and defensive leader. He helped the Wings win a championship team in 2001-02, and mentored young defenders like Jiri Fischer and Brett Lebda. 40 came and went, and Chelios kept plugging away in a winged wheel. He also became a part of the community, starting a successful chili restaurant downtown. Now 45, Chelios has been an unheralded hero of the first two playoff games so far in '06-'07.

And all of those draft picks in 1999 that we gave away? Not one NHL regular came from any of them. In fact, after trading 5 picks in the first three rounds for that year, the Red Wings still managed to walk away with probably the best player in that draft, Henrik Zetterberg. The 2001 pick was used on goaltender Adam Munro, who is not projected to play much in the NHL. Anders Eriksson was in Toronto in a few years and then left the NHL, never playing any better than he did with Detroit.

All told, I'd say we came out pretty well, and with a bright-looking future, while Chicago, who supposedly held the deed to our future, has yet to emerge from its post-Chelios purge, or show any signs of doing so soon.

Of course, picking Kenny Holland's best move as GM is like having to answer the question "Who's Your Tiger?" Grabbing Shanahan, bringing back Larionov, or just finding and nurturing any of our talented youths without any early draft picks -- you can't go wrong with any choice."

Seth and Nate came to visit.

Rainy days are not a good time to visit Jack Daniels in Lynchberg, TN.

Tres had a show in Franklin, TN.

Seth made an impression on Ashley Carol.

Sunday, April 15, 2007


Nothing like a 3:00AM circular discussion of what constitutes "art" to keep you up all night. Balthus, says why can't you just let Tondar sleep? You're not going to answer the most subjective question in the history of mankind tonight.